The Bidwell Crew

To the First Man I Ever Loved...

2012-01-24T20:01:00.002-06:00

It's been 11 years since I last saw you. But even then you didn't know I was there. You lay there sleeping, never to awaken. We'd prayed and hoped that that wasn't the case, that you'd wake up, but I guess the Lord had other plans for you. I remember that night so clearly. The final goodbyes, the songs and blessings. It didn't seem real. As any child can tell you, Daddy's are invincible and they are always there. I always knew you would go before me, but I hadn't thought it'd be so soon. I thought I'd get to see you be grandpa to all my kids, to be at their blessings, birthdays & baptisms. I thought you'd be there for graduations, missions and weddings. You were supposed to be just a phone call away, to hear about all the cute (and not so cute) things that your grandkids would do while growing up. And although I'm sure you're still there and seeing all those things, it just not the same. I can't hear your laughter when my little Eddie jabbers at us like he knows what he's saying. Or see the twinkle in your eyes as Kailyn would climb into your lap to cuddle. I missed getting to watch you take Sterling to a KSU football game or teach Emmy everything she ever wanted to know about anything. You didn't get to build lego creations with Joe or watch Cori's excitment as you gave him some useless thing (keys, string, rope, rocks, etc.) to add to his collection of other useless items. I missed seeing you be a grandpa and that breaks my heart.

I wish that my kids had gotten to know what a incredible person you were, and to love you even more than I did. Cause, we all know kids love their grandparents more than their parents loved their parents. It's just the way things are...or should be. I just miss you.

You were the first man I ever loved. You showed me what my Heavenly Father's love is like because I saw it reflected in everything you did and everything you were. You taught me what a man should be. You were my first example of what it means to love. And because of that, I found a man that is as wonderful as you are. I was so blessed that you were here to meet him and to walk me down the aisle to him.

I was so glad that you held your firstborn grandchild in your arms on the day of his birth. That you got to hold and enoy him at christmas and at his blessing. I only wish i would have taken more pictures of you with him. But I thought I'd have a lifetime to do that. As it is, I have only one with you and Sterling...just one precious, priceles photograph to show Sterling all the love that you had for him. I remember how excited you were to become a grandpa, the pure joy! Oh, how I wish I'd brought him to see you one last time when you called that weekend. But I didn't know! I didn't know that I would never have the chance to bring him to see you again, that you'd never have the chance to hold him again. If I would have known I would have come! I would have stayed and not left your side until your last breath. But I didn't. I'm so sorry. Instead, the last time you held your grandson, you were in a coma. So many regrets.

I want to call you and ask you questions, to tell you about all the things that are going on. I miss being daddy's little girl. I miss your hugs and your advice. I miss your smile and your laughter, your sense of humor and your love. I know you're still there, just out of my sight, but the pain is still real. You are and always will be the first man I loved. I will miss you every day until I finally get to see you again. And in that moment I will run into your arms and hold onto you as tight as I can. I will still be your little girl and you will still be my Daddy. Until then, know that I love you and miss you. And give my baby boy kisses for me. I'm sure you decided that after sending all these other kiddos down to us that you just wanted to hold onto one for yourself. I love you Daddy...forever.

Love your little girl,

Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year!

2012-01-07T09:39:00.001-06:00

We had a fun and busy holiday season. Rob's family has a tradition that each year the weekend before Christmas we head to the farm for a family Christmas celebration. The kids always look forward to this. They get to play with their cousins there and this year was especially nice since the weather was still so warm. Sterling has a cousin, Sam, who's close to his age and they love to see each other. They spent the day just running around outside, being boys. Another of their cousins is Olivia. Although she's a few years younger than Emmy those two have a fabulous time together. Of course Joe and Cori have Will and Finn to run amok with and this year there was a new addition to the celebration, Zoe. She was the hit of the party!She's the new baby of Rob's cousin Natasha and her hubby Jared. Kailyn and Eddie were enthralled with her! It was a wonderful day and I thoroughly enjoyed talking to Rob's family and just having a relaxing day.

For Christmas day this year we actually broke tradition. Normally we open presents at our house then head to Manhattan to split the day between Rob's family and my family. Instead Rob's parents and sister came to our house after their midnight mass and slept here. When the kids woke up at 6:00am we all opened presents together. The four older kids got MP3 players from Santa and several books from us. Sterling and Emmy both got art kits from us. Emmy also got a snow globe, which seems to be a new obsession of hers. Emmy, Joe and Cori got Nerf guns, which they have already lost the ammo to. Cori also got a cardboard spaceship that he can color and play in. Kai Kai got a new baby doll that talks and sneezes. She loved that doll! She also got a new kitchen which she wasn't too happy about Eddie trying to play with. Eddie got a remote control bus, a Leapfrog Laptop and House as well as a Weebles bus. They were so excited about all their gifts. But I think the best part was that Sterling, Emmy and Joe all gave each of their siblings gifts from their own stuff. Emmy even gave Rob and I some money she had saved after her birthday. She also earned a $10 gift card to Barnes and Noble and instead of spending it on herself she bought each of her siblings a book (with a little help from me). It was so touching to see the kids giving their prized possessions to one another without any prompting from us. After that we had breakfast and then Rob's family had to go home. I really liked having them over and so did the kids. It was fun way to spend Christmas morning.

Of course, Christmas fell on Sunday this year so we had church in the morning. After that we came home changed and headed to John and Clara's for the rest of the day. My mom, Jordan, Blake and Rori and Taylor all came over from Manhattan. There was LOTS of food! The kids played, the adults talked and mostly just enjoyed the company. I love the chaos and noise of our family get-togethers. It is so fun to see the relationships that our kids are developing with their cousins. I'm so grateful that we have family that lives so close to us.

For New Years our family and John and Clara's family headed to Manhattan. We hung out at my mom's house. We were joined for awhile by the Smith family. Again, lots of food, noise and just a good time. Clara, Rob and I were stayed up with the kids watching movies. Jordan, Mom, John and Rori all went up to bed. A little before midnight Rori woke up so Mom came down with her. We broke out the sparkling juices (blueberry, cherry and grape) and toasted the new year with the few kiddos who'd managed to stay awake. As fun as it was, I have to say that New Years was a lot more exciting for me when I was a kid. Now, I'd be happy to just sleep through it! It's tempting to just set the clocks ahead a couple hours and pretend! ;-)

We had a wonderful holiday season and a blessed 2011. I'm looking forward to whatever 2012 has in store for us!

Once Upon a Time...

2011-12-19T13:41:00.000-06:00

...13 years ago, to be exact, I married the man of my dreams. He has been my best friend and the greatest love of my life. I was only 17 when we started dating and 18 1/2 when we married, but I've never regretted that decision.

Rob, you are the center of my life and world. You were by my side as we welcomed each of our precious children into this world. And you were by my side as we watched one of them leave. You have been my strength when I had none. After we lost our baby boy, you were what kept me going. When I struggled through the emotional aftermath, you took care of our family and told me to just focus on taking care of myself. You have helped carry burdens that I couldn't bear alone. You are my everything. I thought I loved you 13 years ago when I said "I do" but now, I know that I didn't. What I felt for you then was just a shadow of what I feel now. I didn't understand then what love really was.

“Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being “in love” which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.” ~Captain Corelli's Mandolin

That is our love. It has been tried and strengthed during the hard times and nutured and enjoyed in the good. And although I haven't liked the trials, I know that it's becuase of them that our marriage, love and our relationship is as strong as it is. From the highest highs to the lowest lows, you have been there, loving, encouraging and helping me. And now, we are so entwined that we can not be separated. Thank you for being a wonderful husband and for taking me to the temple to be sealed for time and all eternity. My love for you grows each day and my heart is ours.

Thank you for the best 13 years of my life and to an eternity more!

I love you!

My First Born

2011-12-13T15:43:00.000-06:00

December 12, 2000 at 3:01pm

11 years! My gosh! Where did all the time go? I was sure that only yesterday you were a little boy and now, here you are, almost a teenager! It has been quite the adventure, that's for sure! Being the oldest, you have been our guinea pig, of a sort. In may ways, your siblings have benefited from all the mistakes we made, and hopefullly learned from, with you. And yet, despite our inexoerience, you have grown to be such a wonderful ~~kid,~~ no, young man. I remember holding you for the first time and being amazed that you were here and ours. And you were HUGE! All 9lbs of you squashed into 20 1/2 inches. You were a very happy baby and I loved to snuggle with you and take naps with you. You were also the only one of the kids to get to meet your Grandpa Larry. How he adored you! He was such a proud grandpa. I remember on the day of your blessing Grandpa just holding you through most of church. Sometimes he would call and ask if you could borrow the van and come visit him in Manhattan. He loved you so much! You were a very precocious child. You started walking at 9 months and haven't slowed down since. One of my favorite memories is of you standing up rocking on your rocking horse on your first birthday. You had no fear! Crazy boy! You have always been imaginative, making up "games" of some kind or another. Or creating some thing out of paper and tape. You are a great big brother, playing with your little brothers and sisters and looking out for them. You are very smart and love to read and learn. You also love to play sports and dance. And what a dancer you are! We are so proud of you and grateful to be able to call you our son!

We love you so much! Happy Birthday Sterling!

Our Goofy Eddie

2011-12-08T09:49:00.001-06:00

What can I say? He's our special Ed! :-)

Happy Birthday to My First Princess

2011-11-30T22:30:00.001-06:00

What a perfect baby girl!

Four generations!

Look at those chubby cheeks!

Wow! It's really been 9 years, but it hardly feels like it. My first baby girl was born November 29, 2002 at 11:31pm. She was rather impatient to get here and barely waited until we got to the hospital and into the room before making her debut. In fact, the Dr didn't even catch her, although she was in the room getting gowned up. At almost 2 weeks early she has done almost everything early ever since. She is such a bright and talented child and was even as a toddler. Learning to write, do simple math and draw pictures when barely 3 years old. She has always grasped new things quickly and thrilled at the challenge of learning something new, even if she had to teach herself (can we say multiplication and division?) She excels in anything she tries, whether art, music, sports, math, reading....anything. But she is so patient when teaching her younger brothers and sister, something that Mommy often lacks. She is my little teacher. :-) She is also my little mommy. Emmy loves to help with the younger kiddos, especially her baby sister, Kailyn. It just amazes me how patient she is with Kailyn at night. See, Kai and Emmy share a room and although there are two beds, Kailyn likes...no, demands, that Emmy sleep with her in whichever bed she wants to be in. Emmy obliges. She also makes sure Kailyn has her favorite babies, books, pacifier (yes, Kai still has one ::sigh::) or whatever else suits her fancy at that moment. And then, to top it all off, she'll read to Kailyn whatever she wants to have read to her. She is a truly amazing big sissy. I have even heard her find Kailyn's pacifier in the middle of the night when Kailyn wakes up and can't find it. I am constantly amazed at her intuitiveness, her sensitivity, kindness and patience. We have truly been blessed to have this beautiful, talented and special spirit born into our family. I just adore my little princess and wish she'd slow down in gorwing up into such a beautiful young woman.

We call this the thumb thing.
She's been doing this as long as we can remember.

Sleeping with her baby and Care Bear

Such cute pig tails!

Mommy and her Princess

Ready for preschool

What a beautiful young lady!

What an amazing big sissy!

Sharing her bed with the "baby" princess

Um...yeah...ouch!

Happy Birthday Princess Emmy! We love you!!!

Don't Step On A Crack...

2011-11-17T18:47:00.001-06:00

We all have heard that silly rhyme, right? "Don't step on a crack or you'll fall and break your back" Well, apparently, Sterling's been stepping on FAR too many cracks 'cause he has, quite literally, a broken back. A vertebrae actually; L5 to be specific. We've known about this little back issue for a couple years, but I didn't realize the full extent of it until about a month ago.

The story begins in December 2009 when Sterling started to complain of his back hurting. I thought he was just being dramatic and trying to get out of doing work. Well, he continued to complain so I finally agreed to call Dr. C. After having him do some bending and balance exercises he said he thought Sterling had spodylolysis (spon-dee-low-lye-sis). Which, in simple terms, is a stresse fracture in a vertebrae. He referred us to an orthopedist in town and we had x-rays, MRI and a bone scan done. Sure enough, his L5 vertebrae had a fracture, which showed up as a "bright" spot on the MRI. The orthopedist had us get Sterling a custom back brace. He had to wear it everyday for 6 weeks. After that he did better for a couple months, but the back pain started again. Another 6 weeks in the brace and the same result. At that point the Orhtopedist said that we could try one more session in the brace, but if that didn't work there was really nothing else that we could do apart from spinal fusion. He didn't recommend doing that since Sterling was still young and growing and it could also limit his flexibility. So one more session and...still the same. I didn't even bother taking him back since we weren't going to consider spinal fusion.

Fast forward to October when Eddie had his appointment with an orthopedist at CMH. I mentioned Sterling and his back problems and she asked me if he'd ever been seen at CMH for it. I told her we'd only seen the orthopedist in town. She told me that Dr. P with CMH had done a lot with kids with spondylolysis and to get Sterling in to see him. So we set up an appointment.

At his appointment with Dr. P he started off by telling us that there were other options for treating spondylolysis other than spinal fusion. (Yipeee!!) He talked about bracing again for longer period with electric stimulation to encourage bone growth. If that wasn't feasible, which he didn't think it would be given the amount of time Sterling has had this, the next option would be to do a bone graft to reattach the broken part. He said that they have the most success with this when it's the L3 or L4 vertebrae, but it's still possible with the L5 vertebrae. Finally, if that wasn't possible we could do a spinal fusion but only if Sterling was in so much pain that he'd be better off with less flexibility. He sent us to have a CT done to see how the fracture looked. Now, in my mind, I'd been thinking it was just a stress fracture, or small crack in the vertebrae. I was SHOCKED by what I saw in his CT!

We came back to the room and Dr. P came in and showed me CT results. There was a complete break of the back part of the vertebrae with a large gap.

Side View

Top down view

This was not good news. There was no way that bracing would help and the gap was just too large to even attempt a bone graft. So we were back to spinal fusion as the only permanent fix for it. On top of that, Sterling is also at a greater risk of developing spondylolithesis. That is where one vertebrae slips forward over another causing displacement of the spine and nerve damage...which, apparently, is a bad thing. Go figure. At this point he hasn't developed that and as he only has occaisional back pain, we are just monitoring his condition. Every 6 months or so he will have to go back to check his back and make sure it hasn't slipped. If he makes it to 15-16 years old without any problems then chances are he will be fine and won't have to worry about spondylolithesis until he's in his 70's. If it does slip, then we won't have a choice but to have his vertebrae fused to prevent further, more serious complications.

So, how did this happen, you ask? We have no idea. This type of injury is usually seen in people who participate in highly repetitive sports like gymnastics or football. And Sterling hasn't had any serious back trauma that we can think of. Chances are it's just a developemental abnormality or perhaps a genetic predisposition to it. We really have no way of knowing for sure.

Well, there goes the illustrious football career we had planned for Sterling. ::sigh:: Now how will he make millions so that he can support Rob and I in the lap of luxury in our old age?

Time Travel

2011-11-13T19:12:00.001-06:00

Parent Teacher conferences have come and gone quite awhile ago, but I have been super lazy about posting on here. So we will travel back in time to October and review the kiddos progress.

As usual, the kids are all doing great in school. I was surprised to find out that Joe loves math and does VERY well in it. I also discovered that Cori is in the highest reading group in kindergarten. Sterling does really well in everything but loves science and math. And Emmy...well, she loves everything and excels in everything. We have some very bright kiddos and I'm so proud of each of them for doing their best!

Halloween was also awhile ago, but we'll just continue on our little time travel adventure and post about it now. It was fun dressing up all 6 kiddos this year. We had a monster- biker- type person, a Gothic vampire, Bakugan, a construction worker, Minnie Mouse and...a cheeseburger (what can I say, the kids picked out Eddie's costume). We did go to our Ward's Trunk or Treat and Kailyn and Eddie thought it was so cool that people were just GIVING them candy for NO reason!

The Saturday before Halloween Clara put together a little Halloween party for us all. The giant spiders and web all over her dinning room made it feel really creepy!

The dinner was called "Dinner in a Pumpkin" and was a rice and meat mixture baked in a pumpkin. Yummy! There was also skull cornbread, brains in a cup and witches brew to go with it.

Then for dessert there was graveyard cake and eyeballs! The kids thought it was spectacular!

On Halloween Clara and I took my four older kids and her 3 oldest kids out trick or treating in the neighborhood by our church. We were out for a couple of hours and the kids were so done by the time we finished! We heard quite a bit of "My legs hurt!" but they got a lot of candy. Enough that I was able to take 6lbs of it to the dentist, where they do a candy buy back for $1 per lb, and still have 3 HUGE bowls left!

Halloween was so much fun and we're so thankful to have John and Clara nearby so that the kids can do fun things like this with their cousins and make incredible memories!

Thanks for going on a little Time Travel expedition with me. Someday I might learn to keep my blog updated...but I highly doubt it while I have 6 kiddos! And after that, I won't have anything to write about. :-)

Happy Birthday Cori-O!

2011-10-16T22:06:00.000-05:00

6 years ago on October 11th, Cori decided to make his appearance into the world and into our family. He was one of my babies who chose to come on his own...kind of! Dr. D did strip my membranes, but that was all it took. The next morning, Coriantum Earle was born! He was 8lbs 1oz and bald. I was so in love with that little man and 6 years later, I still am. He has brought such joy and love into our life and into his siblings lives.

He is generally a very happy kiddo and has been from the start.

Tons of smiles and laughter!

And such Mama's little man!

He's got these big blues eyes that just melt my heart.

They are so bright and full of life and joy.

My sweet Cori-O! I spent so much time just enjoying you and

laughing at your antics. You were as goofy as your older brother, Joe.

How could we be so lucky?

Of course, you have you're quirks. You used to have a green string

that you carried with you...everywhere! And you'd wind it up in your hand.

And if you lost it...oh boy! We'd look all over the place just so you

could have it back...and no other string would do!

You also loved cars, trucks, tractors, lawn mowers and all other things that moved

or made noise...you still do!

And then there's the mystery of your hair....

Notice the picture above? You have light colored hair.

After your first hair cut....black....what happened?

We even got asked by people if we dyed it! Same adorable smile though!

You always suprise me with all the things

that you manage to collect. You are our little hoarder. ;-)

If something disappears, the first place I check is you "purse"

that Grandma gave you. Amazing what we can find in there.

You used to carry a small blue purse around stuffed full of your treasures...

Thomas the Trains, rope/string, cars, etc...

and to this day you still have a fascination wth collecting

and with ropes, strings and tying knots.

And last year, you were off at preschool for half the day with your TMNT backpack.

My little boy, growing up far too fast

And now you are at kindergarten all day long and too old for that backpack.

Nope, just a plain blue messenger bag.

Where does the time go?

How glad I am that you are my little boy! You are a wonderful brother and a

great blessing to your mom and dad! How lcuky we are to have you

in our family!

Happy 6th Birthday Cori! We love you!!

A Life Worth Remembering

2011-10-15T22:30:00.000-05:00

October 15th...Just another day for most. Nothing unusual, no reason to stop and recognize the importance of this day to so many people. You may not even realize that on this day, candles all over the world are lit, hearts are poured out in grief and remembrance of lives that were so brief, they may have gone unnoticed by all but a few. But for those of us touched by those short lives, they are life altering and world changing.

I never planned to be a part of this silent club, but then, no one really does. It's exclusive but no one strives to be included. It's unbiased, ~~inviting~~ forcing us into it's ranks without regard to race, religion, age, gender, etc. We come in all shapes and sizes, with backgrounds and stories as different as they are familiar. We are the person next to you in the grocery store, the one with many children or none that you can see. You could be us, and once, we were you. But now, we walk a lonely and terrible path. It is well trodden and yet unmarked; We're left to stumble and find our way through as best we can. Some do it alone, others have those who walk with them, many of us meet friends along the way to share our journey with. Yet, no matter how many have come before us, walk with us or will follow after us on this path, we do it alone. Our grief is private and can't be shared. It is ours alone to bear becuase no one can give back what we have lost...our children.

And although we did not choose this sorrow, this burden, neither would we give it up. It is all we have left of our little ones. To stop grieving, would be to stop remembering and that is unthinkable. Our memories may be few and the physical evidence of the life of our child may be non-existent, but they are no less real and no less loved than the children that are held and cherished here and now. Their names are often left unsaid and to us, that is heartbreaking. Their lives are often forgotten by those around us and we are left to remember in silence. Can you imagine never again hearing the name of your child, or having those around you forget of their existence?

And so it is that today is a day I celebrate. Today is a day that my son isn't forgotten. Today his life, although confined only to the time in my womb, matters. Today, our club is not silent. Although you may not even know that we are here or hear us, we say the names of our precious children. The ones who have never had the chance to say their own names or, perhaps, even heard their name spoken. At 7pm in each time zone, candles are lit, names are said and stories are remembered. Lives that were too short are celebrated and mourned. But for this one day, we are not alone. We are surrounded by those who share our grief, who know our loss, and who walk this lonely journey with us. For 24 hours there is light to brighten our dark path. And for 24 hours our child is not forgotten.

And so, for today, if you will take one moment to stop and say the name of a baby that has been lost, even just to yourself, they will not be forgotten. For today, look around and be aware that you may have friends and family that only want to have the name of their lost child spoken, to know that they are remembered. It is one day, one moment...but it may be the only time in the year that our children matter to anyone but us.

I miss you baby boy! You are my sorrow that I carry every day, the grief that I have been chosen to bear, but you are also my hope, my joy, my son. Today, I say your name for all to hear so that you are not forgotten. I love you Robert Allen!

Then Again, Maybe It's Not!

2011-10-06T10:08:00.002-05:00

Putting on these shoes is a process!

Ugh! It is. It's not. Oh, wait, it is. That's what it's been like with Eddie's monkey feet. The original diagnosis of metatarsus adductus was overturned by the nurse practitioner at CMH who diagnosed skewfoot. So we made an appointment to go back to see the Dr and find out what needed to be done. On Oct 4th we headed up there and met Dr J. She looked at Eddie's feet and x-rays and....wait for it...wait for it...nope, not skewfoot. It's metatarsus adductus! She didn't see anything that looked like he might have skewfoot. The treatment for MA...a $90 pair of shoes that insurance won't cover...and there's no guarantee that they'll help. ::sigh:: Oh, well! Far better than the treatment for skewfoot that I read about (casting, surgery). He's supposed to wear the shoes whenever he is awake. Not the most stylish shoes...and not what I would have picked if I HAD to spend $90 on a pair of shoes, but hopefully they work! We go back in 4 months for a follow up so we'll see if there's been a change. And by the way, no, they are not on the wrong feet. :-)

Movie Night, Anyone?

2011-09-30T20:24:00.001-05:00

Baby Momma

Starring Kai Kai as Baby Momma

At Least He's Not a Pot Head! ;-)

Starring Eddie as Bucket Head

Story Time with Eddie

Starring Eddie as Himself

Emmy Cheerleads and GI Joe's Birthday Party

2011-09-27T21:09:00.000-05:00

We had a busy weekend! We had signed Emmy up for the TWHS cheerleading clinic for the 2nd year. The clinic was last weekend but on Friday was the game! She always has so much fun cheering and we get a kick out of watching her. She was more involved this year, whether because she knew the cheers better or just because she felt more comfortable, I'm not sure. This is one of my favorite cheers. The little Cheerleaders only cheered for the 1st half so we left after that since Eddie was NOT happy about being there. But it was a fun family night!

On Saturday morning Joe (finally) had his 7th birthday party. We didn't really have a theme but he wanted a motocross cake. This was probably one of the EASIEST cakes I've made so far but it turned out really cute!

The boys went on 2 scavenger hunts, played pin the tail on the donkey and then the highlight....

the Pinata!

Later Saturday evening the kids' school had their annual Fall Festival. There was lots to do, but the cutest thing was Joe dressed up in army gear! He even climbed in and sat in the real Humvee. He makes such a handsome GI Joe! And his Uncle Blake was so proud. :-)

A Skew What?

2011-09-18T22:01:00.000-05:00

Eddie had his appointment at the orthopaedic clinic at Children's Mercy Hospital on Thursday and I came away knowing less than when I went. Our journey began when Eddie started walking and we noticed something weird with his feet. I blogged about it HERE if you want to go back and read it. This is what they look like when he's standing:

At his 1 year check up our pediatrician, Dr. C, said he thought Eddie had metatarsus adductus. MA is when the bones in the front part of the foot turn in towards the body. Well, we went to CMH thinking that was what he had. When we met the nurse practitioner she and the intern-resident-student-person with her, examined Eddie's feet and legs. After about 10-15minutes of pulling, twisting, bending and flexing the nurse practitioner told us that Eddie did not, in fact, have MA like we thought. She suspected that he actually has something called skewfoot. She talked a little about how his tendon in his arch is tight as well as his achilles tendon, how his foot isn't as flexible as it should be which is what happens with skewfoot (I guess...). At that point I took him to get x-rays to see how his bones were growing. Pretty cool looking huh?

After reviewing the x-rays she told me that she was sure that at least his left foot is skewfoot, although his right may be MA. She also told me that we would need to see a surgeon, not because he needs surgery, but because he needed someone who specializes in things like this. If it had been MA she would have shown me some stretching and physical therapy to do, but she wasn't able to treat skewfoot. She also said something about Dr. J deciding what to do and if casting would be necessary. (WHAT?? Casting a walking toddler??) So I set up an appointment with Dr. J to have Eddie evaluated for skewfoot and we left.

I have soooo many questions though. I felt like I didn't get any useful information other than, he has skewfoot and she couldn't treat it. So I called our awesome pediatrician and talked to his equally awesome nurse, Jennifer. I told her what we'd found out and asked if she could find out from Dr. C what skewfoot was, how it's different from MA and how it's treated. Dr. C called me later that evening (yes, he called me in the evening! That's how amazing he is!!) and basically said he didn't know what it was and couldn't find anything other than a couple brief references to it in their database. He apologized that he couldn't help me out. I threatened to find a new ped for the kiddos ;-), but that will never happen unless he leaves the practice for some reason...and he'd better not or I, along with my friend Danna and SIL Clara, will be forced to stalk him and move wherever he goes! ;-)

So here we are, more clueless than even before. I have managed to find a couple articles on skewfoot and MA but, unfortunately, they are research articles and are written in medical lingo so I don't understand them at all. :-( I did find one article that explained skewfoot in somewhat layman's terms but I still don't understand how what I read applies to Eddie. I guess I'll just have to wait the 2 1/2 weeks until his next appointment at CMH.

:::SIGH:::

Back 2 School... A While Ago

2011-09-15T11:07:00.000-05:00

Yeah, soooo...school started about a month ago, on August 16,

and I just realized that I never posted any pictures of the kiddos on their first day of school.

Oops! Well here they are:

Sterling is in the 5th grade!! I can't believe it!

This will be his last year of elementary

school. In our district middle school starts

in 6th grade. He is in Ms. H's class and was so excited

to go back to school and see his friends.

He will also be playing trumpet this year in band. Wohoo!!

Emmy is in 3rd grade and in Mrs. N's class.

Mrs. N loves frogs and science and Emmy is looking

forward to all that she'll learn in class. I just hope that

she'll be challenged. So far, she finds it too easy. ::Sigh::

What can you do? :-)

Joe is in Mrs. H's 1st grade class. She was also Emmy's

1st grade teacher and we are excited to work with

her again. Joe is also excited to be back with his

friends and to learn to read like his big

sister and brother. He also managed to finally

learn to tie his shoes!!

And finally, Cori. He started kindergarten

and was lucky to get Mrs. K. She was Sterling's 1st

grade teacher and we LOVE her! Of course, we've loved all

our teachers at school so far. Our school has been blessed to

have the most incredible and wonderful teachers! Cori loves

school and especially getting to ride the bus again. It's all

day kindergarten and I miss him, but he doesn't seem to mind

at all.

And here's our happy group shot on the first morning before

heading down to the bus stop. Hopefully it will be a fun year,

with lots of learning and no trouble! ;-)

One Year Older and Wiser Too!

2011-09-02T11:29:00.000-05:00

No matter how often Rob tells him not to, Joe insists on growing! It's rather frustrating really. Growing means new clothes and shoes, more food and, ultimately, less time before he's all grown up and living his own life. :-( Why can't they stay little longer...although there are days that I wish they'd grow up even faster!

Although Joe started off as my smallest baby at only 7lbs 10 oz, that didn't last. He soon grew into my chubbiest, rolliest baby! He had a cute round face with chubby cheeks, rubber band wrists, and a little Buddha belly. I LOVED all his glorious chubby.

He was also my little vampire baby! Instead of getting his teeth in in a normal patter (bottom 2 middle ones, top 2 middle ones) he decided to be...well weird. He got two of his outside top teeth in first which made him look like he had fangs. It was hilarious, but then Joe has always been our goofy boy!

And have I mentioned that ADORABLE dimple in his cheek?

I love that dimple! He actually has one in each cheek,

but the one in his right cheek is the most easily seen.

And then there's his thumb sucking and ear rubbing habit.

He adored his binky, but about 6 months after we took it away he

suddenly started sucking his thumb!

And to this day, when he is tired or upset, in goes the thumb and

often times the other hand rubs his ear.

Did I mention he's our little goof ball?

He makes me laugh with the faces he makes!

But he is also one of our sweetest kids.

And a wonderful brother to all his

siblings!

Happy 7th birthday sweet Joe Joe!

We love you very much and are so grateful

that you are part of our family!

A Picture Post

2011-08-18T18:40:00.001-05:00

That doesn't look comfortable!

Ummm...yeah...crayons can go in ears.

Sometimes I just can't believe how
beautiful my little girl is!

So proud of himself for climbing up on Joe's bed

Potty training is so exhausting...!

...So is eating, apparently!

...And watching TV. What a sweet
big brother to cuddle with her.

Kai likes to cuddle with Eddie at nap time.

Eddie REALLY liked his cupcake!!

"I have 2 babies!"

Maybe he's a ballerina in his sleep? ;-)

Kai and her buddy Ainsley holding
hands while Danna and I were walking.

Meet Me in St. Louis

2011-08-13T20:20:00.000-05:00

We decided to take our kids to St. Louis for a weekend vacation a couple weeks ago. Interestingly enough we didn't got to see the arch or any of the other "normal" St. Louis tourist stuff. Other than hanging out at the hotel and swimming the only thing we did was to go to The Magic House. We had gotten a really great deals on tickets (10 for $40, normally it's $8.75 ages 1+) through Groupon so that was what prompted the getaway in the first place. I wasn't really sure what to expect but WOW was I impressed! We spent over 5hours there and the kids were occupied the WHOLE time. They would have even stayed longer if we'd let them. There is just so much to do and experience!

The traveling exhibit was Alice in Wonderland and that's were we started off. You could play instruments shaped like mushrooms, have a tea party, peek through the doors and try some fun experiments of the Mad Hatters. There was even a mirror that when you looked in it, you could see the Cheshire Cat! Super fun!

Another incredible feature was the beanstalk in the middle of the building. It went from the basement level up to the 2nd floor. It was completely safe, surrounded by netting and with no way to fall down it. The four older kids had a blast climbing all the way to the top and back to the bottom.

And then there was the Bubble Room!! Bubbles, bubbles everywhere! There were several different areas to experiment with bubbles. The biggest hit? How about putting yourself INSIDE a bubble!

One of the kids favorite places was the Children's Village. Just like it sounds it was a miniature village that the kids could play in.

There was a stream with magnetic fish that you could fish for at the pond. A tree house, a grocery store, a house, a restaurant. Upstairs there was a nursery with babies and all the things you need to take care of them. Downstairs there was a grocery store and bank (both of which Sterling robbed....should I be concerned??) and a few other things.

Another couple exciting areas where in the basement of the house. One was the construction site. In it you could see how a house is built, including the electrical and plumbing. As well as an area where you could practice interior design.

The other area was a setup of the three branches of government. Anyone guess what they are? Anyone? There's the legislative, which was a room with a podium that you could speak into facing benches, where the legislature would sit. Then there was the executive which was a mock set up of the Oval Office. I liked the people who sat in there better than the one that is in the real one. Kai made a great president talking on the phone and pushing buttons. She'll start a nuclear war yet! ;-) The final branch was the judicial. This was a court room where the kids could wear a judge's robe, sit in the witness box, jury box or at the defense or prosecution table. I do have to say that Sterling looks a BIT like a hostile witness!

One of the coolest things we tried was the Van de Graaf generator. It was so exciting that it made our hair stand on end! ;-) Ok, not funny, but still super cool and fun!

These were just a handful of the exhibits and fun things we did that day. There was so much more to see and do that we didn't get pictures of or didn't post the pictures of. It was definitely one of the most fun museums we've ever been to!

Summer Fun

2011-08-02T22:43:00.000-05:00

During the summer my MIL, Pat, does me the tremendous favor of kidnapping one kid at a time (except Joe and Cori who we had to combine this year) and letting them stay with her for a few days. This year, she took them to Nana Great's farm to stay with her and Nana Great. My kiddos sure had F-U-N! Incredibly, I don't think they even watched any TV and I suspect that they didn't even complain about it since they were kept so busy. I only have pics from when Sterling was there so I will post those and maybe if I end up with pics of the other kiddos I'll add those to a new post.

Sterling and his cousin Sam got to hang out and swim

Uncle Erwin was kind enough to take my

city boy fishing and suprisingly...

Sterling managed to catch a couple of fish!

This was the bigger one that he caught.

The smaller one was used as bait.

Aunt Jana was also SUPER nice and let city boy play

farmer on the tractor. And, Yes, he is ACTUALLY driving it!

Of course we won't talk about how he almost ran over Aunt Jana.... ;-)

When Emmy went she had a tea party with her cousin Olivia.

I heard it was a hit and everyone had a fun time.

While they were there, all the kids got to swim, run around, play card games and who knows what else! They also got to help take care of the goats which I think was a highlight for all involved! Even Kailyn got to spend one night with Nana and Nana Great. Eddie was still a little too young to go, but next year, he'll be ready!

I'm not sure what they did the whole time, but not one of them came home complaining about being bored and all of them want to go back! I'm amazed! We can't get through one day without hearing the dreaded "I'm bored" but they went several days with no computer or TV, just using their imagination and hanging out with Nana and Nana Great. I was so glad that they had the chance to do all those fun things that we just don't get to do here in the city or even if we could, to find the time and energy to do it with all 6!! I think it's great that they had the chance to spend time with their Nanas and to have that one on one time that they don't often get here at home. Thanks Pat for giving them such wonderful memories!

Conversations to Remember

2011-07-30T22:41:00.000-05:00

Rob ran in the Warrior Dash today in Kansas City. Apparently, it's a rather difficult 5K obstacle course. But he ~~finished~~ survived and called me on the way home:
R: Do you feel any different?
Me: Different?
R:Yeah. Do you feel any different now?
Me: Than what? How I've felt all day?
R: No. Does it feel any different now that you're married to a REAL warrior?
Me: ha.....ha.....ha (eyes rolling)

He's even got the ridiculous hat and medal to go with it. I'm soooo lucky...or not! ;-) Good job babe! I love you!!

Happy 5th Birthday Robert Allen!

2011-07-16T19:22:00.000-05:00

It's hard to believe that it's been 5 years since our little boy was stillborn. It doesn't seem like it's been that long since I held him for the first and last time. So much has happened since then, but even with life moving on, not a day has passed that I haven't thought about him. But now, when I think of him, it's not usually with the raw grief that it used to be. I can think of him and feel happy and grateful that I had even those few months with him inside my womb; That I felt him move and heard his heartbeat. I may not have experienced those things with him after he was born, but that doesn't make them any less precious to me. I wish I'd had even just a few moments with him, alive, after his birth, but that wasn't what Heavenly Father had planned. But I know, that although I didn't get to raise him, or share in those experiences here, there will be a time that I will get to. After we are resurrected I will have my son, I will get to raise him and love him just like every mother dreams of. He may not be here physically but I know his spirit is always near. I am grateful that I have the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I am so thankful that through his holy priesthood my son is sealed to our family for eternity. Death can not separate us permanently. We may be separated for now, but it is only temporary. After this life, I will have him with me forever, as well as all my other children and my husband. It is hard and I do still miss him so much. There are so many times that I want to just hold him one more time, or kiss him, feel his breath on my cheek or feel his hand grasp my finger. But I will wait and trust in the Lord's plan for him and for us. Until I can have him in my arms, I will entrust him to my Savior's and to those of my family who have gone on before. They will give him all my love, the love that I can't show him...yet. I love you baby boy! You are always in my heart.

InstaFriday!!

2011-07-08T20:13:00.000-05:00

Inspired by my wonderful friend and blogger Danna at 3 Pink Cupcakes I've decided to try and participate in a fun blog activity called....InstaFriday! You just post pics taken with your cell phone of everyday moments taken throughout the week.

If you want to participate or just browse, head on over to Life.Rearranged!

On Sunday on the way to Nursery, cousin E. grabbed

Kai's hand and walked with her to class.

Such Cuties!!

Eddie Boo Bear loved dancing with

Robosapien at Grandma's house. He'd cry

whenever it stopped!

Sweet little Kai Kai loves to play mommy

to all her babies.

The biggest and the littlest. Eddie adores his older

brother Sterling and Sterling feels the

same way about his baby brother!

This is (most) of the kiddos from our trip to the

Zoo today. We met up with Danna & my sister-in-law Clara

with all their kids and hung out all morning! We are such great parents!!!

A cupcake's worth...$1?

2011-07-07T21:25:00.000-05:00

At least at this incredible bakery here in town called Billy Vanilly they are! We went on a little outing with Clara and the kids and our friend Danna and her kids. I've...err...I mean, WE have been looking forward to this day for a few weeks now. We all met at Billy Vanilly to buy mini cupcakes for $1 each. They are little but the perfect size for a small reward, snack, or for little hands.

Eddie makes that cupcake look GOOD!!

And just so you know, I didn't leave Sterling out, he happens to be spending the week with his Nana so he missed it...this time at least. I'm SURE we'll go again....VERY SOON!!

Boo Bear's 1 Year Check Up

2011-07-05T20:54:00.001-05:00

Boo Bear had his 1 year check up today at the Dr's. We have been so lucky to have the best pediatrician and nurse in the world! So we always look forward to check ups and seeing them. Today was no exception. Emmy didn't come with us but made our nurse a picture of a talking hamburger for me to give to her. After talking with our nurse for awhile we got to see Dr.
For the most part everything looked great with Eddie. He weighed in at 24lbs. 1oz., was 31in. tall with a head circumference of 19.29in. That puts him in the 82nd percentile for height, the 66th percentile for weight and in the 90th percentile for head circumference. Basically he's tall, average weight with a big head. Hehehehe. Maybe that means he'll be smart??? Or maybe not, but regardless, he's reached all the milestones that he should have by this point, and then some. What can I say, he's advanced! ;-) His ear tubes look great and he's just perfect....except for his feet. See, when he walks or stands they do this:

And THAT is NOT normal, apparently. We've noticed it for awhile now, but I figured I'd just talk to our pediatrician at Eddie's check up since it wasn't an emergency. Turns out Eddie has something called Metatarsus Adductus. It's a foot deformity where the bones in the front half of the foot turn in towards the body. Here's a picture to compare the two:

He has a moderate case of it so, after some discussion between the Dr and I, we decided it would be best for Eddie if he went to see a pediatric orthopedist in KC. There are ways to treat it, but it depends on the age of the child and the severity of it, to decide what, if anything, will be done. So, at some point, I will be making a journey to KC to find out if Boo will have anything done with his feet. This boy just has to do whatever he can to set himself apart from the rest of the crew I guess! But I still adore the boy and, despite his weird feet, will keep him!

Family Fun Night

2011-06-29T20:07:00.002-05:00

Yestereday was the annual KDOT Retreat for Rob at work. Not sure what all that entails for him, but for us it means an inexspensive dinner and fun activities at a reduced cost. In years past they've had it at Gage park with free train rides, carousel rides and admission to the zoo. But this year it was at the Family Fun Center on 10th St. We had BBQ riblets or pork, baked beans, potato salad and pop. There was also a photo booth where we could take silly pictures, which we did, but I'll have to scan them, then post them. After that we had our choice to do two activities. Our kids opted to go and drive the Go Karts first. They were so flippin' cool! Joe, Emmy and Sterling were tall enough to drive the small ones by themselves:

Here are the three older kids coming around the final bend.

But Cori had to ride with me. We had so much fun though!

We went really fast...so fast that he made slow down.

For some reason, Rob didn't want to go on the Go Karts so I took Kailyn on them.

At first, while we waited to go, she started crying, calling for daddy. But once we got

started she seemed to enjoy it, though not neary as much as Cori...or Me.

After going on the Go Karts (twice) we took the kids over to go play Gooney Golf.

As you can see, Cori needs a little work on his form.

Although he did get a hole in one on this hole...

with some help from Daddy!

I'm thinking our kids need to go putt putting more often...

Joe totally missed the ball the first swing.

Emmy was fun to watch.

She kept switching from right handed to left handed putting.

And here's Sterling after his hole in one on the same hole as Cori.

Kai Kai just putted on a couple of holes mostly she just wanted to do things like....

...this. This is Kai's version of putt putt. That and stealing other people's golf balls.

And Eddie, well, he just looked adorable the whole time.

Rob did let him out to walk around for awhile, but mostly,

he just watched.

We had a really fun time as a familyand ended up gettin home around 9:30pm.

It was a late evening but so worth the fun and memories!!

Eddie's 1st Birthday Party

2011-06-26T22:40:00.001-05:00

Well, it's over. My little Boo Bear is 1. Sad, I know. We did have a fun party for him on Saturday though. There were lots of friends and family there to help us celebrate. The Russells and the Dashiells came with their kids. As well as my mom, Taylor, Jordan and Blake and Rori, John and Clara and their kids, Pat and Bruce and Sara. Altogether there were 17 kids and 12kids. It was a house full!

Eddie got lots of cool presents including a lawn mower, shopping cart, musical instruments and a musical toy. He also got a couple books, a toy remote, a Little People gas station, a helicopter learning toy, an alligator push toy, and a semi truck with a car on it. And to top it all off he even got a great, big ball! What a spoiled little boy!

As for his cake, I was up until 3am finishing it but I really liked it.

I thought it turned out pretty cute with all the pictures of him!

I'm Not Ready for This Day

2011-06-25T08:00:00.046-05:00

I'm not. It's just way too soon and way too fast. Wasn't it just yesterday that I held that sweet newborn baby in my arms? That I kissed him for the first time and felt his warm breath on my cheek? That I ran my fingers through that sweet, soft, curly hair and drank in his perfection? Where did the time go?

I'm not ready for this!
Wasn't it just a few moments ago that we brought him home? And that he learned to smile and laugh? When did he learn to roll over and crawl?
And when did he learn to walk?
I can't believe that my little boy, my last baby, is turning 1 year old today.
He's grown far too fast. I tried to just enjoy it and make it last, but time has still flown by. And I'm left wondering where it went. I love this little man. His goofy smile, and adorable personality. I'm so excited to see as he grows, to watch who he becomes, but I wish I could have back those moments that have passed. I want to hold him again for the first time, and watch him grow all over again, but I can't. Those moments are past and I'll just have to be content with whatever comes in the future.

Happy 1st Birthday Boo Bear!
I love you so much!!

The BBQ

2011-06-23T09:11:00.001-05:00

The Sunday before Father's Day Clara and I decided to have a last minute BBQ so we could practice our BBQ skills. So, Clara and the kids came over after church. John WOULD have been invited, but he was out of town training. We decided to be really fancy and try a couple new things. We knew the kids wouldn't appreciate our experiments, so we kept the meat simple...hotdogs for the kids and chicken breasts for the adults.

Yummm!!!!!

This is Clara and I grilling...yep, working hard!

Our first experiment was grilled zucchini.

We used butter, salt, pepper, garlic powder, basil and onion powder.

We brushed it on the zucchini then grtilled it.

It might not look it but,

it was SUPER delicious!!

Our second experiment was grilled onions.

For those we used olive oil, salt and pepper.

They were even better than the zucchini!

I made a fresh fruit salad from cantaloupe (yuck!), honey dew melon,

and strawberries. I even put in a little bit of sugar.

The kids seemed to really like this, me...not so much.

We did try grilling some of the fruit in honey or sugar,

but I wasn't really impressed.

Clara made her incredible corn casserole!

I LOVE this stuff! There wasn't any left at the end

of the BBQ.

And that was the menu for our impromptu BBQ. Not too bad if you ask me!

And even (somewhat) healthy!

Adventures in Orthodontics

2011-06-21T18:12:00.000-05:00

Emmy got her bottom expander out and had it replaced with braces. The braces are not for straightening her teeth, but to help create a little more room for her teeth to come in. Here are the pictures of her getting them:

Say CHEESE, Emmy!

Notice the slight green tinge to her bottom teeth?

She needs to brush more often!

(It's actually a cleaning agent to help the braces stick)

Ooooo! Her mouth glows!!

(The light sets the adhesive so the braces don't come off)

Emmy's new purple and black braces!!

She was a great patient. She did say that for the next couple of days her teeth hurt, but I guess that's normal for braces.

Perspective

2011-06-08T20:08:00.000-05:00

Sometimes things happen in life that completely change our perspective on the things that we hold to be true and other times they reaffirm what we've always known, opening up new insights and understanding into things that we thought we already knew. The latter has been the case for me recently.

Some dear friends and wonderful people that we know recently decided to leave the Church. It has been a difficult decision for them, but in the process of making it I have had the chance to talk to them and re-evaluate my beliefs and my understanding of some of the more basic principles of the Gospel. I have come away a better, stronger and more committed person because of it and although I'm sad to see them leave the Church, I am grateful that I have learned so much from them.

I have come away with a much stronger testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel. I have often taken for granted that I know that, but it is a very precious gift. I have always known that a prophet of God leads this Church through revelation from the Lord and it has always been enough for me that if the Lord commands it, I will do it. That is still the case, but sometimes I don't understand why he commands something. So, why follow those commandments when I don't understand all the reasoning behind them?

I've realized that I am still a child when compared to my Heavenly Father and my brother, Jesus Christ. My understanding of myself, the world, even the universe and all the laws that govern such, are VERY elementary and finite. Their understanding, however, is infinite and perfect, grasping concepts that no mortal has even begun to consider. The Lord is the creator of our bodies and our universe, he understands them and their workings in ways that we can't even begin to fathom. He knows what is good for our bodies and our spirits because he knows, perfectly, how they function and interact with the world and substances around us. To question One with perfect knowledge when He commands would be foolish.

It's like a 2 year old child, who being told by her parents not to play in the street questions why. She may think that she's done it before and nothing bad happened, or felt that she can see any danger before it is close.The commandment from her parents doesn't make sense to her limited understanding. As the parent of that 2 year old, I can see danger that she cannot, I have knowledge, understanding and experiences that she does not. Her 2 year old mind simply cannot grasp the danger that she may be putting herself into but that doesn't make the danger any less real. Given that, if the Lord says it's not good for me, I trust that implicitly because He wouldn't lie and neither does He have commandments simply for the sake of having commandments. There is always a reason, even when we don't or can't comprehend it. I trust in that.

I also realized that part of my purpose in being here on this earth is to learn to become like my Savior and my Heavenly Father. To do that, I have to live as They would live, to choose those good things that They would choose. To do and think and speak as They would. To become like them I can't sit idly by professing a belief but refusing to act on it. To BECOME something, I must DO things that make me into that. Simply believing that I can be a doctor doesn't make me one. I must take the classes and practice the skills that will make me into a good doctor. It is the same with becoming like Christ. When the Lord spoke to Peter and Andrew he said, "...^aFollow me, and I will make you ^bfishers of men. And they straightway left their nets, and ^afollowed him." (Matthew 4:19-22) To become "fishers of men", they had to act, they had to leave their nets and follow. It wouldn't have been enough to just believe that the Savior could do, they had participate in their transformation. Otherwise, Christ wouldn't have been able to make them into the people He knew they could become. I am the same. He knows me and my ablilities, my strengths and weaknesses. He wants to make me into something more than I could become on my own. To do that, I must follow Him and trust in His commands; That by doing as He commands, even when I don't understand it, I will become what He wants me to become.

Granted, I will fail and follow imperfectly. No matter how hard I try I will always fall short. I can't become anything on my own. I need His grace and mercy because I inevitably sin and make mistakes. But together, if I will submit to His will and rely on His grace and atonement, I can become like Him and return to live with my Heavenly Father.

It is hard, uncomfortable and even painful at times. Trials come and test my faith. But it is in these moments of trial that I am perfected. It is in the trials that the growth takes place and without them I would be stunted and unable to learn or move forward. It is also in those moments, that my faith and understanding are solidified and my reliance on the Lord for everything, made clear. I couldn't get through this life without Him constantly at my side, encouraging me, helping me and even carrying me at times.

I love His gospel and His Church. I am who I am because of them. I know that it can be hard to live as He as asked me to, but I am committed to doing it. Becuase in the end, all the pain and sorrow will fall away, leaving pure joy and perfect understanding. For now, though, I will walk by faith, knowing that in each of his commands there is a purpose and a skill that I can learn to make me more like my Savior.

Our Little Adventure Part 4: Utah, Wednesday thru Friday

2011-06-01T16:29:00.001-05:00

On Wednesday we finally had some really nice weather so we decided to make it the day we headed to Temple Square. To get there we decided to take the TRAX which is a train that runs through Salt Lake City into some of the outlying areas. The kids were really excited about that.

Temple Square is such a beautiful place, so calm and peaceful. There were quite a few things to walk around and see while we were there. One of the first things we did was tour one of the visitors centers. Inside there was a replica of the temple that was cut open so you could see the rooms inside. The kids thought it was really cool to see. As we were heading over to the other visitor's center we met a couple of sister missionaries. Their names were Sister Bruno, from Bazil, and Sister Ku, from South Korea. They took us into the Tabernacle (the silver dome shaped building in the top picture) and we listened to a demonstration. The Tabernacle has incredible acoustics! You can hear everything perfectly from anywhere inside, and that's without a sound system! Even if the speaker faces backwards, it's easy to understand what they're saying. They even dropped a pin and ripped some paper and you could hear it as if someone next to you were doing it!! AMAZING!! The missionaries then took us to the other visitors center where we learned about the Church's humanitarian aid. Then we went to my favorite part which is up a spiral walkway. As you ascend the walls are painted like space. When you reach the top there is a large statue of Jesus with his arms outstretched. It's called the Christus. It is a beautiful statue and the peace that you feel in that room is wonderful. I can't wait until I can meet my Savior for real someday! What an incredible and sacred experience that will be!

Kailyn was so excited to see "Jesus" and wanted to get right up there and touch him. Even Eddie smiled huge when he saw the statue. I really believe that children recognize Christ in ways that even we adults can't. They did just leave his presence not to long ago after all. We loved talking to Sister Bruno and Sister Ku but it was time for us to go see other things. I really wish we had some way to contact them! We just fell in love with them! They were so sweet and kind and helpful. And the kiddos just adored them and ate up all the attention they could get from them. So, if any of you out in UT have a chance to go to temple square, could you find Sister Bruno and Sister Ku and give them our email address or something, PLEASE!! Thanks!!

After touring all that we decided to go to the Church Office Building to take the elevator up to the observation deck. You could see for miles! The top picture was one I took looking out over Temple Square. After that we took pictures of each of the kids in front of the Temple then headed over to the Conference Center to take a tour and go up to the roof. The Conference Center is huge! The coolest thing is being in the auditorium part and realizing that there are no columns supporting the ceiling! You can go HERE to see some amazing photos of it.

According to LDS.org,

"...the 21,333-seat Conference Center auditorium is believed to be the largest theater-style auditorium ever built. The second-largest, the Auditorio Nacional in Mexico has about 11,000 seats...Large enough to comfortably hold a Boeing 747, the auditorium's volume is 8.5 million cubic feet. The Tabernacle's volume is 1.5 million cubic feet. The famed London Royal Albert Hall is just over one-third the volume of the Conference Center with 3 million cubic feet."

And according to Utah.com

,"The Conference Center is truly a feat of engineering. It contains a 21,000-seat auditorium with a 7,667-pipe organ and no visible support beams, plus a 900-seat proscenium-style theater and 1,300 parking spaces below the building on four levels. It also boasts four acres of landscaped roof with trees, an alpine meadow of grasses and wildflowers, fountains, and a waterfall. The main support beam for the Conference Center weighs 621 tons, and the electrical wiring is over 50,000 miles in total length. Despite sqeezing all of this into an area equaling less than a square city block, the structure exceeds building code requirements for withstanding seismic forces in the event of an earthquake."

It is an awesome sight to behold and even more so when you consider the engineering that went into it! Although I think the kids favorite part, by far, was going up to the roof and seeing the garden. There were trees and flowers, grass, bushes, etc. Pretty stinkin' cool since we were on top of a building! After all that walking on Temple Square we decided it was time to head back to the hotel where we swam and rested.

Now our original plan had been to head home the next day (Thursday) but after some begging, pleading and compromising Rob and I decided to stay one more day. Thursday we didn't really do anything. We mostly hung out at the hotel. Although I did make a quick, ok looong, trip to the nearby Quilted Bear. Then we took the kids to Deseret Industries, a Church owned thrift store, to look around and get some clothes and shoes. My brother Larry, his wife Megan and their son Allen then joined us for dinner at the hotel, followed by the movie, "Little Fockers" in our room. It was nice to have time to just relax and talk with them.

Friday morning was busy getting everything ready to go. After another delicious breakfast we headed over to my cousin Camille's house to say goodbye to her and her kids. It was sad to be leaving but w were excited to get home and sleep in our own beds and in our own rooms! We had decieded that as part of our compromise we would drive straight through to Kansas. We left around 8:00am Salt Lake time and got home around 3:30am our time. A nice long drive of about 18 hours. It was a wonderful vacation seeing our family and friends and even some of the sites around Salt Lake! Thanks for the good times and memories!!

Guess Who! UPDATE

2011-05-27T13:41:00.001-05:00

Who is it?

Picture A is Edison and B is Cori!
They look A LOT alike! :-)

A B

Our Little Adventure Part 3: Utah, Monday and Tuesday

2011-05-25T22:54:00.002-05:00

     We had a very busy week while we were in Utah. Nearly everyday involved some kind of activity (or two!) We were trying to get as much in as we could before heading back home.

     On Monday we spent the day with John and Clara and their kids and Larry and Megan and baby Allen. We originally wanted to go to downtown Salt Lake to Temple Square, but it was rainy and cool out so it was decided that we would go to Ogden to the Hall Aerospace Museum. Before we headed over, we had lunch at this place called the Burger Bar. It was soooo good! If you're ever near Ogden, it would be well worth the trip to stop in and eat there.

     The kids L-O-V-E-D the museum. There were all kinds of planes from the very first bi-plane made by the Wright Brothers (well, maybe not THE original, but at least a replica) all the way to the SR-71 Blackbird. WOW! IT was so fun to get really close and look inside the planes. One of the volunteers there even let the kids climb into the back of one of the helicopters called "The Jolly Green Giant". Outside the museum were even more planes that you could walk right up to and touch. They were massive! It was just really neat to see and read all the information they had about these planes and when and what they were used for. Seeing the progression from the beginning to some of the more modern planes was quite incredible too.

Following our airplane adventure we went to the mall in Ogden and hit a store called "The Quilted Bear". If you like crafts and handmade items this is THE place for you! There were home decor items, clothes, stuffed animals, hair bows! It was so much fun just browsing. I didn't end up buying anything there, but I found out from Clara that there was one right down the street from my hotel, so I did end up going there on Thursday and getting a few (read, A LOT!!) of hair stuff for my girls.

After leaving the mall we headed back to Salt Lake to join my cousin Camille and her family for a wonderful dinner of clam chowder and taco soup with homemade bread sticks. DELICIOUS! While we were there my other cousin, Jen, came over and offered us tickets that she'd gotten from work for the aquarium in Sandy. We had talked about going and so it was perfect and saved us quite a bit of money. (THANKS JEN!!)! It was fun to spend the evening with them. An we decided to have them come join us for a swim and dinner the next day at our hotel.

On Tuesday we were planning on meeting our friend Jennifer and her daughter, Allie, at Thanksgiving Point to go to the Dinosaur Museum in the afternoon. So that morning we decided to pack a lunch and head to the aquarium to kill time. There were so many neat things to see, but my favorite part was probably petting the sting rays. They felt soft and rubbery. Sterling and Emmy didn't have a problem doing it, but Joe and Cori had to be "encouraged" to try it. Kai wanted absolutely NOTHING to do with trying to touch those things. She'd scream if we tried to pick her up to do it. We also really liked watching the penguins walk back and forth in a line in their exhibit. Only one penguin even jumped in the water while we were there. It was a pretty cool place to visit.

And here are some o the cool animals we saw:

After leaving we went to a small park and had lunch then headed out to meet Jennifer and Allie. The museum was really awesome! It was almost all hands on! It starts off with some simple experiments with light and color, then you go through this "tunnel" that is pitch black except for pin points of light that look like stars. (If you click on the first pic to the left, you can see a little of what I'm talking about) You walk on a catwalk off the ground so you're surrounded by these stars. It's VERY disorienting, but super cool! You feel like you're walking in space! Kai was kind of freaked out by it at first, but the other kids thought it was the BEST THING EVER! The rest of the museum focused on the dinosaurs. It was pretty cool to see how big and small some of the dinosaurs were. Near the end there was a giant sand and water table were you could play in it to build landscapes to see how the water affected it. The kids liked building huge dams and then crashing them and wiping out all the little dinos and trees that were in the way. I have to admit that even I got into it...Kailyn, not so much, but she liked watching. At the very end of the museum are two sand pits where you can pretend to dig up buried "fossils" with brushes. Eddie liked to eat the sand, but wasn't very good at digging up the fossils. It was a really fun experience!

Next we headed back to the hotel where Jennifer and Allie came to swim with us. Allie didn't care how cold the water was, she just wanted to swim! And it was fun for me to just sit and talk to Jennifer. We've really missed them since they moved! After about an hour or so Jennifer had to go but our cousins came to join us There was a lot of splashing, playing and yelling and even some crying (the pool was kind of cold still and the little ones were not so excited about that). The kids played games together, raced and just had fun fun fun! I even managed to FORCE myself to get in the big pool instead of hanging out in the hot tub the whole time.

After swimming for another hour and a half we went up to the room and sent Rob and Camille's hubby, Bruce, out to get pizza. We sat and ate while the kids watched a movie. Unfortunately, it was a school night for our cousins so they had to leave to go home. It was so fun to have them there with us and we were sad to see them go, but we had a lot of fun while it lasted! And we'll always have the memories!

To Be Continued...

Only in Movies...Right??

2011-05-21T20:10:00.000-05:00

Yeah, apparently not. Crazy things DO happen in real life. And thanks to the city's police department I was "lucky" enough to have one of those moments!

While I was out running errands with two of my kids and a friends daughter yesterday, I decided I wanted to go by Family Video to see if they had Season 2 of House MD on DVD. When I drove by the lights were all off, so I knew they weren't opened yet. I drove out of the parking lot trying to decide if I wanted to just go home. I decided to pull off on the side of the street in the neighborhood nearby and check the hours on my phone. According to the website most stores open at 10am so I called to make sure that was right, and it was. Seeing as I had about 10 minutes before it opened I decided to just drive around until it opened. Seemed reasonable, right? Apparently not.

After a few minutes I noticed this grayish truck following me. Every time I turned, they turned. When I stopped, they stopped. At this point I thought that it kinda looked one of my friend's truck, but couldn't figure out why he wouldn't just call if he wanted to talk or whatever. So then I thought, maybe I did something while driving and made them mad and they're waiting for me to stop to yell at me or something. Since it was finally a little after 10 I decided to go ahead to Family Video and see if they still followed me. So I pulled in and parked and sure enough the truck pulled up behind me. I wasn't sure what to do. I looked behind me and there was a guy getting out of the truck and he was a police officer. I was so confused!

He came up to the van and I rolled down my window and he asked what I was doing driving around the neighborhood. I told him that I was just driving around until Family Video was open. He said they'd been having a lot of break-ins recently. Then he asked to see my license and commented, "Oh, you have kids with you?" And I was like, "Uh, yeaaaah," and handed him my license. He told me to wait a moment then went back to the truck. As I waited I noticed a Sheriff's deputy walk up next to the right side of my van and stand up by the store. Then there was a tap at my window and there was the original officer plus another officer in plain clothes. I roll down my window and the new officer says, "Would you please step out of the vehicle?" I was absolutely terrified! Were they going to arrest me? What had I done? Was there a warrant out for my arrest that SOMEHOW I wasn't aware of? Had someone stolen my identity and done something? What would happen to the kids if they took me in?

So I started to get out and the office suggested I roll up my window so rain wouldn't get in. I rolled it up, turned off the car and took out my keys and walked up in front of the store. The new officer then starts in on me. He asked why I was in the neighborhood and I repeated that I was waiting for Family Video to open. He then said that they'd seen me parked on the street for a few minutes, then driving all over the neighborhood. So I told him, "I pulled over to check Family Video's hours on my phone since I thought it'd be a better idea than trying to do it while I was driving. Then I was just driving around until it opened." He said, "Well, you could have done all that in the parking lot, right?" And I said, "I could've, but I didn't". Then he proceeds to say that they saw my white "cargo van" (yeah, cargo van with seats in it???) with the "blacked out" (ummm....or just tinted) windows (can we say exaggerating) driving around and that neighborhood has been hit really hard recently with burglaries and can I see how that might have been suspicious. I said, "I guess so, but "you obviously ran my license and know that I've never even had a speeding ticket. And I have three kids with me and they wouldn't be much help in robbing a house". He said that they didn't know that at the time. I did say that if it had been my neighborhood I would've have wanted them to do the same thing if they thought they saw a strange vehicle driving around. We ended parting company amicably enough with handshakes, me thanking them for all their hard work and wishing them luck catching whomever is robbing houses. But, WOW! What a morning! That stuff only happens in movies...right? I guess not.

The moral of this story...don't drive around neighborhoods or you may get pulled over as a would be house robber. But, if you do happen to encounter a grayish truck following you and a police officer gets out to question you, tell him I said "Hi"

Our Little Adventure Part 2: Utah, Saturday and Sunday

2011-05-18T21:30:00.001-05:00

Our saga continues as we get up Saturday morning (May 7) and head out to Utah. We follow behind my brother Larry and his family in their car and my mom, Jordan, Taylor and Rori in Jordan's car. It was such a beautiful drive, even though it rained most of the way. The way we drove actually took us through part of Yellowstone. Although we wanted to stop at Old Faithful, given the weather, we opted not to. We were however lucky enough to see this sight as we were nearing the exit out of Yellowstone:

Yep! It's a herd of buffalo. They were just sitting there on the side of the road without a care in the world. The traffic didn't faze them at all! The kids were absolutely amazed by this sight! And they looked so cute, just standing there in all their ginormous hairiness! I wanted to take one home as a souvenir but Rob thought that was a bad idea...not sure why...they looked friendly enough to me.

Of course the thing that was most amazing was this buffalo here======> We suspect she may have just given birth as there seemed to be an umbilical cord hanging out of her...ummm...well, you know what. And she seemed rather confused. She was wandering down the middle of the road, crossed to the left side then came back to the right side. My brother in front of us was trying to go past while she was on the left side of the road but she just kept coming on over to the right side forcing him to pull off almost onto the shoulder and stop until she got onto the shoulder of the road. It was pretty awesome if you ask me!

After the long drive to Salt Lake City, about 8 or 9 hours, we FINALLY got to our AWESOME hotel. We stayed at the Homewood Suites in Midvale, UT. Super nice!!!!! At $98 a night we had a 1 bedroom suite with 2 double beds, a sleeper sofa and full kitchen (minus an oven). In addition to that there was a complimentary hot breakfast (think bacon, eggs, pancakes, biscuits and gravy, etc) and Monday thru Thursday a complimentary evening meal. And since lunch could be cooked in the room it was AWESOME!! I think the part the kids liked best was the swimming pool and hot tub. Granted the indoor pool was rather chilly and the hot tub was a tad on the hot side, but they didn't seem to care. We spent Saturday in the hotel and just relaxed from our long journey with watching TV and swimming.

Larry Allen Balsmeier III
This boy has stolen part of his
Aunt JJ's heart! <3

On Sunday we met Larry, Megan and Allen at church with the rest of the family for Allen's baby blessing. As a reminder, the Mormon church does not believe in infant baptism, but when a baby is born we bring that infant in front of the congregation and those men who hold the priesthood and have been invited by the parents to join in, take the baby in their arms and a blessing is given by one of them (generally the father if he holds the priesthood). It was such a special moment when Larry took Allen up and with John, Rob and a few other men, gave his first child a blessing. It has been a long road for Larry and Megan to get that sweet little man here. But how grateful we are that he is here and healthy and doing so well!!

Later that evening we had the privilege of going to my Aunt Kathy and Uncle Bob's house where some of my cousins were hanging out. It was so great to sit and talk with them while my kids ran around and played with my cousin Camille's kids. This is the 3rd year in a row that we've been to Utah and my kids love to talk about going to see their "Utah Cousins". They see each other so little and yet they pick up right were they left off each time. It helps that our kids match up in age so nicely. Everyone has a playmate the same age or really close to it:

Marianne and Sterling

Emmy and Esther

Isaac and Joe

Cori and Timmy

Kailyn and Lil' Bruce

Not pictured are Alice (she was being shy inside) and Cooper, who is the newest member of their family. Eddie is also not in the picture. I think he was still in his car seat in the van.

After chilling with them for a little while we headed back to the hotel to meet up with our good friends the Allreds! They used to live out here in good ol' KS but went back to UT once Steve finished law school. We went swimming with them and their sweet little girl Allie. That child is such a FISH! She LOVED the water and was not happy when forced to get out of the pool when it was time to go. It was fun to sit and talk and catch up on all that has been going on since we saw them last year. After that it was off to bed to recover from the busy weekend and get ready for the fun and busy days ahead.

To Be Continued...

Our Little Adventure Part 1: Montana!!

2011-05-15T19:53:00.002-05:00

     On Tuesday, May 3, 2011 around 9:00pm we embarked on a journey of epic proportions. It would involve driving through 7 states, approximately 3,000 miles, in about a week and a half. All together there were 3 vehicles plus a trailer and 18 people. Of those 18, there are 7 adults and 11 children. The kids range in age from 10 years down to 10 months. Given that information, you now know why we decided to leave at night. We were hoping they would sleep for most of the 17 hour drive to Billings, MT where we would stay for a couple of days before going to Bozeman and then onto Salt Lake City, UT. It did work rather well. The kids slept fairly soundly and somewhat comfortably. Kai and Eddie probably had the hardest time, waking every so often wanting a paci or to see me or...something. We made really good time...until the kids woke up on Wednesday morning. At that point we ended up stopping about every 2 hours for potty breaks, gas or food. Once we did reach Billings we checked into the hotel and relaxed for awhile until the guys took Scott out for his "Bachelor" party, which I think involved a movie and not much else.

     Thursday morning, Rob and I took our kids plus my neice Rori to go see Pictograph Caves. It was a small, though somewhat breathless, hike up to a couple caves were there were drawings. The kids loved it!

     Thursday was also when Scott and Laura went to the temple for their endowments. Poor Jordan and Taylor got stuck watching all the kids plus, since Larry and Megan joined us in Billings on Wednesday, they had their baby boy, Allen also. A grand total of 12 kids, 10 years down to 2 1/2 months, against 2 adults...WOW!! It was so wonderful to be at the temple though. Once we got on temple grounds you could just feel an incredibe sense of peace. Watching Scott and Laura together in the celestial room and getting to be there with so many family members and new friends was amazing. I can't wait until we meet our family after we die. I imagine it will be quite an amazing reunion! After the endowment session it was back to the hotel to change then off to Golden Corral for dinner. Oh What FUN!!!! Laura's family was so kind and friendly. We know why Laura is as amazing as she is! Of course the highlight of the trip was on Friday!!

     Friday morning was spent getting everyone ready for the wedding. LDS temple weddings are not your traditional walk down the aisle with birdesmaids, flower girls and ring bearer events. They are very quiet, pivate and sacred events. The sealer talks to the couple, offering advice and counsel and then the actual ceremony, which only lasts several minutes, takes place. In all you are probably in the temple less than 30 minutes. But, there is nothing more beautiful than getting married in the temple of the Lord, not just because they look breathtaking, but becuase of the covenants and promises made. To know that you are being bound to the person that you love more than anything, for not just here and now, but for all eternity is....joyous. I, of course, cried the entire time. Mostly from joy, but also a little sadness that my dad and baby Robert Allen weren't physically there, although I'm sure they were present in spirit. But the reminder that because Rob and I, as well as my parents, had made those same covenants as Scott and Laura made, we would all be together forever was so comforting. I can't imagine not having that hope, that knowledge, that through the priesthood of the Lord we can be sealed to our families for time and all eternity. I am so grateful for that. It was such a touching experience and gentle reminder of the promises that have been made to me and my family if we will strive to be like Jesus and to trust in his atonement, grace and mercy.

The beautiful bride and her handsome
nephew. The groom sure had some
competition!!

     After the sealing we headed out onto temple grounds to wait for the happy couple to come out. As they exited the temple they looked gorgeous and so happy! Officially married and ready to start their new life as a married couple. There were, of course, pictures taken which is an undertaking in and of itself. Try to get a group of a few dozen people, including children, to all look and smile at the same time...Yeah, exactly. But we managed to get it done and head on out to Bozeman for the reception that night.

     It was a 1 1/2 hour drive to Livingston to our hotel. We got there and rested for a few moments before going to Scott and Laura's new house in Bozeman to help unload some stuff. Then it was to Laura's parent's house to change back into our wedding clothes to go to reception.

     The reception was so fun and in the cutest place. It was a really simple affair, but the important thing was that there was a play area outside for the kids to run off some energy. We talked, ate cake and ice cream took more pictures and then helped to clean up. The best part was when my brother's serenaded Laura with the song from "My Best Friend's Wedding". It's kind of a family tradition. After all was said and done it was crazy, busy, beautiful, hectic, amazing, touching, wonerful, spiritual day! We got back to our hotel around 10pm, ordered and ate pizza and then crashed before beginning the next leg of our journey.

To Be Continued...

Easter Fun

2011-04-30T22:06:00.001-05:00

THE BASKET HUNT

Umm...Eddie, that's not your basket

THE EASTER EGG HUNT

Emmy found the golden egg that had

$1 in it! Wohoo!!

Happy Easter!!

Science Fair Project

2011-04-30T21:25:00.001-05:00

A couple weeks ago Sterling entered his school's science fair. It is actually required for all 4th and 5th graders to participate. He decided to do aproject he called "To Bean or Not to Bean". The premis behind it was to see if lima beans would grow when watered with liquids other than water. He used milk, apple juice, pickle juice, vinegar and water.

We were up until 10:30 or 11:00 that night geteting the board all ready, but it looked really good when it was finished. The next day he took it to school for the fair that night. Unfortunately, it ended up being cancelled due to bad weather (our school district cancels all activites whenever there is a Tornado Watch). The judging was potsponedd until the following morning when the kids cme to school. Sterling was exctied to see that he had gotten a PERFECT score: 100/100 A+!! He even got a Science Superstar ribbon!! Way to go buddy! We are so proud of you!!!!

The Trip I Did Not Take

2011-04-18T22:12:00.002-05:00

I just love my little brood of kids! They are my life and I can't imagine it without a single one of them. Yes, it's hard. And it can be frustrating and overwhelming and loud and all those other things. But, it's so worth it.

These moments when they are smiling and laughing (and getting along!!), fill me with a joy beyond comprehension. The most coveted title that man could convey, the most lavish endowment of gold, silver, or precious jewels, or the grandest award offered, could not even begin to compare to the privelege of holding in my arms, even one of these precious children. No honor, acheivement, crown, award or glory given by man could ever compare to the gift and the joy of being a wife and a mother. To hear my precious children tell me that they love me or to give me an unprompted hug or kiss is the greatest reward in life.

I do not regret any missed travel, job or even education because I will always be able to do those things later. But being here, every day, teaching, working with, loving and holding my children is only for now; it will pass by in mere moments. And someday soon I will look back and wonder where the time went and when my babies grew up.

To m greatest acheivments,

my children,

I love you forever and ever!

Mommy

"You are the trip I did not take;

You are the pearls I cannot buy;

You are my blue Italian lake;

You are my piece of foreign sky."

~Anne Campbell

Conversations to Remember

2011-04-14T21:46:00.001-05:00

Last Saturday we were at the kiddo's soccer games. In between games Rob took the boys to the bathroom. This is what Cori said:

C: "M-E-N.....That spells bathroom?"

Another FINE example of public education! In his defense, he hasn't started kindergarten yet and at least he recognized the leters. ;-)

Update in Pictures

2011-04-06T19:47:00.000-05:00

Sterling

This is Sterling's car from

the Pinewood derby this year.

Sterling is a handsome boy and I

actually got him to smile for me in this picture!

Here Sterling is getting beat up by Kai. He played

like that with her for quite a while!

Emmy

What can I say? The girl's got her own

sense of style! ;-D

She's so beautiful. I love her smile!

Here are a couple of hairstyles tha we did in Emmy's hair

Emmy with her "boyfriend" Maddox ;-)

Joe

Such a cute looking kid even when

he's trying to be tough!

Joe had his kindergarten music program

yesterday. Don't tell anyone, but Joe and

the girl to his left (in the black and white)

like eachother and were spotted holding hands before the

program started **GASP**

Upside down boy. Nice belly!

Cori

Cori got a new bike this year.

And it even has hand brakes!

He has such a handsome smile and awesome Perry the platypus pajama's

We went to the zoo with our cousins and friends.

While there the kiddos played at the park.

Love my boy!

Kai

"Got hat and glubs!"

Kai getting pushed by her wonderful

big brother Sterling.

Kai is getting really independent.

She just gets into the fridge, grabs the

bread and jam (or in this case, frosting!??)

gets a knife and brings it to me saying "Some toast?"

The girl has her beauty routine.

Here she is putting on her pretty's,

a.k.a chapstick. She did this 15 times in 1 minute.

She does such a good job dressing herself!

By the way, the shirt has 2 sleeves and in the back

you could see her cheeks hanging out! ;-)

Eddie

Eddie fell asleep on Rob's feet one afternoon.

He can sleep in the most awkward positions!

O! This boy just melts my heart!

Poor Boo Bear!

Look at ALL that sadness! Mama

left him in his crib to fall asleep...

Which he finally did after some

crying and while he was still sitting up!

Just a Picture Post

2011-03-27T10:37:00.002-05:00

How can I not love this little man and his big smile?!

Eddie and his cousin, Rori, fighting over the dog dish at Grandma's house

Joe lost his FIRST tooth!!! Yay!!!

What a cutie!!

Kai, Daddy and Eddie

Who doesn't love a man who knows his way around the kitchen? ;-)

Kai in Emmy's shoes...they are BIG shoes to fill too!

Took this one morning while on a walk with
my sis in law, Clara and my bestie, Danna. I love
the hat!

Wheeee!! Love the "mohawk" from the wind! hehehe

"Mmmm...yummy arm!"

Messing around with the filters on my phone camera.
I LOVE how this one turned out!

My biggest boy and littles boy. Aren't they handsome!?!

Action shot! Woot Woot!

"I can get TWO binkies in my mouth! How many can you fit?"

Eddie just crawled over and plopped down by Sterling just like this.
It was so cute, I couldn't pass up the photo op!

Another action shot! Kai had just kicked the soccer ball.

"See my pitty(pretty) tar(star)! Pitty!"

Watchin' all the soccer action at
Joe and Cori's praactice.

Ooooo! Ball!

WTH (What The Heck)??

Pshaw! I could do it better....if I could only walk.

Ummm....not to sure about that....

Yeah, I know I'm good lookin'.
Keep checkin' me out!

Ahaha! A BIG ball!!!

Such cute chubby cheeks!

I just adore this sweet little curl by his ear

My curly haired little man!

Tiny hands and fingers

Eddie hands clasped together while he sleeps.

A Poem from Emmy

2011-03-16T20:47:00.001-05:00

Kinda Creepy Pics

2011-03-16T20:45:00.001-05:00

The one of the apps on my phone gives the camera on my phone the capability to apply filters to pictures. So one eveningI was playing around with it and decided to use the filter labeled "Horror" and this is what I got:

My Rainbow Baby Is 2!

2011-03-04T10:13:00.001-06:00

How time has flown! I can't believe that my baby girl is already 2 years old! She has gone <====from this tiny, helpless, little girl, to this====> independent big girl. I remember well, the moment we found out we were pregnant and the worry, excitment and anticipation of her birth. It was a long road to get to have her here with us and she brought a lot of healing to our home and hearts. Some of you may be wondering about the title of this post and wanting to know what a rainbow baby is. It is a term used to describe a baby born after a miscarriage, stillbirth or infant loss. Here is the best description I can find explaining why we use that term, ""Rainbow Babies" is the understanding that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope." That is my Kai Kai, my sweet rainbow baby! I am so gratefu that we were blessed to have her in our family. She is definitely spoiled by all her siblings....and maye even mom and dad, but she also loving, kind and quick to hug, kiss and say "I love you". I simply can't imagine my life without her.

For her birthday party we had my family and our friends the Russells over to have dinner and then some cake. Dinner was excellent (of course, since I made it!) And the cake...well, that was an interesting story. See, Kailyn has this new obsession with Pinkalicious so I made her a Pinkalicious birthday cake. It looked awesome!!! Until it fell over an hour later, before we could serve it...Oh well!! Still tasted yummy and Kailyn didn't care. And it looked great while it lasted!

Daddy's Girl

2011-02-09T21:42:00.001-06:00

Kai loves to steal Daddy's hat.

And Daddy loves it too!

I just love how she squeezes her little arms around our necks.

Oneof the sweetest things is seeing my two little princesses snuggling together each night.

We put Kai in her bed and she immediately grabs

her pillow, blanket and ladybug night light

and climbs into bed with her big Sissy.

We can hear them laugh and talk and when we check in on them

we will often find Emmy reading to Kai. I adore my little girls!

Kai climbed into her little pretend play pen

and Rob put Eddie in her lap.

Those two little kiddos just love eachother!

He's crawling!!

2011-02-05T19:31:00.002-06:00

Way to go Eddie Boo Bear!

Conversations to Remember

2011-02-05T11:58:00.001-06:00

BABIES AND MARRIAGE

***WARNING***

SOME GRAPHIC CONTENT IS INCLUDED IN THE FIRST CONVERSATION!!!

Conversation #1: Cori comes into my room this morning sits on my bed and begins...

C: Mommy, babies come out of girls bottoms.
M: Ahhhh....Hmmm?
C: They come out of girls bottoms? I think. Babies do.
M: Yes Cori, they do. There's a special hole called a ____ that babies come out of. It's different from the ones a girl uses to pee or poop. It's just for babies.
C: I don't know how they squish out of your bottom.
M: (???) It hurts a lot.
C: Did you cry?
M: No, I didn't cry.
C: Okay.

I thought I handled that unexpected conversation well. And Cori is now more versed in childbirth. :-) A few moments later he came back in and began another conversation...

Conversation #2:

C: Did Jesus tell us to marry our friends?
M: Yes.
C: I'm going to marry Noelle. (A friend from church and preschool)
M: Why do you want to marry Noelle?
C: Because I love her!
M: Why do you love her?
C: Uh! Cause she's pretty!
M: (Uh, duh me! Why else would you love someone!)

I can see how talking bout babies could lead to talking about marriage, although I honestly hope to have those conversations in the opposite order when he gets older!

Let it snow!

2011-02-03T18:34:00.003-06:00

We didn't spend any time outside these past few days. Not because of all the snow, but because of the single digit and smetimes sub zero temperatures! However, we did manage to have a little fun in the snow with previous (and slightly warmer) snow storms this year.

Ummm...yeah... I don't know either.

Snow chair by Sterling

Snow chair by Emmy

Snow bed by Joe

A Snowball Fight with Daddy

It took 2 days...

2011-02-03T12:26:00.003-06:00

...countless hours, and MANY, MANY tries, BUT.....I FINALLY managed to create and apply my own background to my blog!! Wohoo! It's not great, and I can see where I need to improve, but I'm just happy that I finally got something that (kind of) works. I'll try something else another time but for now, I'm just leaving it as it is!

It's been over 10 years...

2011-01-28T19:57:00.002-06:00

...since I last saw you.

...since I told you I loved you

and heard you say it back.

....since I felt your hug.

and I could hug you back.

...since I heard you speak

or could listen to your advice.

...since you saw your grandson

or held him in your arms.

...since I had you here with me

where I could see you, touch you, talk to you.

Each day, each milestone, each moment

is tinged with sorrow

because you're not here

to share in it, to tell about it, or to see it.

I don't know why you had to go,

and I wish you could be here to watch as your grandhildren grow up.

To share in the cuddles and laughter, the accomplishments and sad times.

I didn't plan on you not being here for my life,

but I know that you are near.

Watching over us, laughing with us,

and sharing in all lifes big and little moments...

I just wish I could see you doing it.

I miss you Daddy!!

2/27/1955-1/24/2001

Love,

Your little girl

Me & my Daddy 1989

My Daddy and Sterling 12/12/2000

Kai and Eddie

2011-01-28T09:12:00.001-06:00

Eddie actually seemed to enjoy his breathing treatments!

Kai is such a good mommy! Here she is taking care of her baby.

Night night baby!

Rob and I went out to lunch one afternoon and took Eddie along with us

He looks so cute in this hat!

He was hungry, I guess...

Never seen this medical procedure before...toe suctioning???

Thanks for the concern Kai!

Mmmmm...Oreo!!

Eddie REALLY wants to crawl. He can get up on his hands

and knees, rock back and forth...but that's it.

He does manage to get around by pushing himself on

his tummy. Soon enough though

he'll be ALL over the place!

What a handsome boy!

2011-01-23T21:30:00.002-06:00

Our sweet little boy is already 6 months old! And sadly, I've never had professional pictures taken of him. So we were lucky enough to have an incredible friend who agreed to take some photos of Eddie. Here are just a few of the hundreds she took and the around 30 we narrowed it down to for editing. Thanks so much Shanna!

He's worrried about how the economy will affect Daddy's job with KDOT

He's a reverent boy!

Catching Up

2011-01-14T23:26:00.001-06:00

Since the kids are in bed, I thought I would take a few minutes to (finally) update our blog. It seems like I can never find enough time to do this....can't figure out why... ;-)

On Decemer 19, Rob and I celebrated our 12th anniversary! I can't believe that we've been married a dozen years already! How I ever got so lucky to catch such a wonderful man is beyond me. We've had an incredible marriage and I've never regretted getting married at the ripe old age of 18 (and 1/2). We've had many, many wonderful things happen in our marriage like the births of our 6 incredible kiddos, vacations, quiet moments together, and countless other things. We've also gone through some terrible times together. Losing our son Robert Allen was by far the worst, but I wouldn't change any of it for all the world, the good or bad. The good times give us hope through the bad, but the bad is where we've grown to love and know eachother better. You can't even begin to love someone 'til you've walked through fire with them because that's when you see them at their worst and best and love them completely despite it. No matter how hard things are I know that Rob will always be by my side, supporting me and loving me, keeping me sane and happy.

Of course following our anniversary was Christmas! It was probably our largest Christmas so far, due to my incredible shopping savvy. Sterling and Emmy each got a Sansa Fuze 4GB mp3 player, compliments of Santa, as well as some other cool things. Joe got a Paper Jamz guitar from Santa and the corresponding amplifier from Grandma. Cori got Toy Story 3 and Toy Story Mania plug and play video game. Kai got lots of baby stuff like a high chair and play pen as well as some other toys. And Eddie got a weebles treehouse, which he admittedly doesn't seem to play with much....go figure! Each of the older kiddos also got a Sing-a-majig from Nana. If you don't have the privilege of owning one you have my sincere pity...maybe.

Not sure where he learned that gesture ;-)

Eddie playing on the ipad

On December 30, Eddie decided that he wanted a break from all the chaos at our house, so he proceeded to be admitted to the hospital for observation for low blood oxygen saturation levels! It was VERY peaceful and quiet there with just me and him, but we were lucky enough to have a friend come visit bearing dinner and an ipad to keep me occuppied. Thankfully he was released the next afternoon, just about 9 hours shy of New Years. This meant that the insurance will pick up the tab as our insurance didn't restart until January 1! Way to squeeze every last drop out Eddie! And most importantly, he was just fine. :-)

At our friend's baptism

New Years Eve was rather uneventful. The kids stayed up until midnight watching cartoons and went to bed soon after that. And on New Years day we had the incredible privilege of attending the baptism of some close friends of ours.

Since then life has been busy as always. The kiddos headed back to school after Christmas break and I was so relieved to see them go. Don't get me wrong, I love my kids and enjoyed having them home, but 6 kids home all day makes for a wild, loud, full house!

A Decade...

2010-12-15T13:02:00.003-06:00

10 Years...

120 Months...

520 Weeks...

3652 Days...

No matter how you calculate it, it's been a loooong time since I held my first baby, a "little" boy, in my arms. Born on December 12, 2000, Weighing in at 9lbs even and measuring 20 1/2 inches he was quitte a bundle. He was the first grandchild on both sides and the only one who was lucky enough to get to meet my dad before he died. He was born on his due date, but hasn't been on time since.

He hit all his milestones early and by 9 months old was starting to walk. He was our little daredevil. On his first birthday he got a rocking horse. He climbed right on....proceeded to stand up on the seat and rock on the horse as hard as he could! He is our mischevious, goofy boy who loves to try and get a laugh out of you.

He's a handsome guy with hair that's as wild as he is!

It's been 10 years of super hero, tough boy and ninja.

As well as running, jumping, climbing, and riding

With 8 years of loving,

Sterling and Emmy

cuddling and sharing,

Sterling and Cori

snuggling and holding,

Sterling and Eddie

smiling and laughing,

Sterling and Kailyn

hugging and kissing,

Sterling and Joe

All his many little brothers and sisters!

Sterling is such an amazing, wonderful boy and he's growing way too fast. In just a couple years he'll hold the priesthood. A few more after that is dating, then a mission, marriage and children!!

But for now, I'm gonna hold my little boy tight, and enjoy the kisses and hugs while they are so frequently and freely given. I am so proud of his many accomplishments and am grateful that we were chosen to be the parents of this amazing child of God.

Happy Birthday Sweet Boy!!

It's Great to be 8!

2010-12-05T22:55:00.001-06:00

I can't believe that my princess is 8 years old already! Her birthday party was on Friday, December 3 and she had two friends come over to stay the night. As far as parties goes, it was pretty low key this year. Emmy opted to do a slumber party instead of having a "themed" party. We had pizza for dinner and then we opened presents. She got all kinds of art supplies from her friends and a Didj from mom and dad. She LOVED everything! The girls then decorated and ate cupcakes. After that they decorated pillow cases to take home with them. We rented "Ramona and Beezus" from Amazon Video on Demand and made popcorn. The girls stayed up late, watching the movie and playing. They all had fun, but the next morning came early since it was a BIG day for Emmy. It was her baptism day!

Emmy was baptized on December 4, 2010. Eight years ago she was a tiny bundle with little fingers and toes who needed me for everything. Our little princess has grown so fast and is now so independent. I miss snuggling her and holding her, but I love watching as she learns and grows each day. She is incredibly smart and talented. I don't thinks there's anything that she can't do and do extremely well. She's an excellent artist and excels in math. She loves to read and write and can be found late at night (WAY past bedtime!) sitting in her closet reading a book. And no book is ever too hard for her. I am so grateful that the Lord choose us to be parents to this special little girl. What an incredible blessing she is to our family!

Emmy and The Balsmeier Family

Emmy and Uncle Taylor and Grandma

Emmy and The Arnolds

Emmy and Nana

The Bidwell Crew

The Princesses in their matching dresses

Kai loves her sissy Emmy

Nana made their beautiful matching dresses.

Thanks so much Nana!!

The sister's sitting and waiting for the baptism to start.

Seriously?!

2010-11-18T21:16:00.001-06:00

Wow! October 24th huh? That was the last time I managed to blog. Sad isn't it? And so much has happened so I'll just cover a couple things right now. On Halloween we went to my mom's house where my sister hosted a Halloween party for the cousins and some friends. There was yummy food, cool games (including a treasure hunt) and fun activities. We had a Red Power Ranger, an elephant, a ninja, Mitchie from Camp Rock, a ghost pirate and a sea otter.

And here is Roar-i (haha) the white tiger attacking Kailyn the elephant

What an adorable sea otter Eddie is! I loved his tail and his feet!

The red-eyed ghost pirate....kinda creepy!

One of the games was wrapping Blake and another friend in toilet paper to look like mummies.

It was fun cleaning up all the toilet paper after wards!

The other "major" event was wacky hair day at school. Joe opted for a mow hawk.

Sterling wore a headband.

And perhaps the wackiest hair of all...?

Emmy with her Cindy Lou Who-hair.

We have had other exciting happenings, but those stories will have to wait for another night.

hOPpy KAilYn

2010-10-24T22:22:00.001-05:00

Kai went shopping with me the other night

and as we walked through Walmart, this is what she did:

This girl just cracks me up!

PTC's for SEJC

2010-10-23T22:23:00.001-05:00

On Wednesday we had Parent Teacher Conferences for Sterling, Emmy, Joe and Cori. Everything went pretty much as we expected...all the kiddos are being expelled. ;-) Just kidding. As always, the kids are doing great in school.

Cori was our first conference. He attends the Deaf and Hard of Hearing preschool as a peer model. His teacher, Ms. O, told us that Cori is doing well and finally starting to participate more in class. He likes to play with the other kids and often involves them in his playing. Apparently he like to be a plumber and "fix" the sink and phone in the kitchen area....didn't know plumbers fixed phones...To involve the other kids he allows them to be his helpers by holding his tools and stuff like that. He'll be a great boss someday!. I've been impressed with the amount of sign language that he is picking up and he really seems to enjoy it too!

Joe was next. Ms. S had only good things to tell us about Joe. In some ways I expected him to have the hardest time adjusting to school and having to sit quietly and all. But apparently he is doing wonderfully! He loves to give his teacher hugs and gets along well with all his classmates. He is proficient in almost all the areas that he needs to be and improving in the ones that he isn't proficient in.

Emmy is excelling as always! Her teacher told us that at the beginning of the year the students took a test over everything that they WILL be learning in 2nd grade. Emmy's score......98%!! That means that out of all the things that she is supposed to learn in 2nd grade she already knows 98% of them. She is in the highest reading group and reads with a 99% accuracy. Her teacher has her help other kids with their sight words since Emmy mastered those in Kindergarten. Ms. B tells us that when Emmy is done with her work she goes to the "I'm done" box and takes out multiplication or division worksheets to do while she waits...the problem is, they haven't learned that yet. LOL! Not to worry though, Emmy has taught herself to do them both!

Sterling is doing incredibly well this year also. He has all A's except one B. And two of his A's are 100%! He is doing and turning in all of his homework, which in previous years has been a struggle. Sterling really loves his teacher Mrs. K and she seems to be a wonderful match for him. Mrs. K likes for the students to attend their conferences and she had them fill out a sheet with questions about how they (the student) think they are doing and where they can improve. My favorite question "My goals for the future are: 'not to doze off when we are supposed to be working"! At least he's honest and according to his teacher, accurate! :-D

Overall, we couldn't be more proud of our kiddos! They are all doing so well and being such wonderful examples. We have truly been blessed with 6 amazing children and we are so glad that they are ours for forever! The Lord has blessed us beyond measure with such bright, precious spirits to care for and we are so grateful to Him.

WAY TO GO KIDDOS!!

Picture Day Hair Do Sneak Peak

2010-10-05T21:30:00.001-05:00

We have discovered the art of rag curls and we LOVE it! Wll, I do anyway. Emmy pretty much just tolerates my new found obsession. The best thing about rag curling is that they are comfortable to sleep in and come out SUPER tight. After a couple of days to relax they give Emmy a beautiful soft curl. So as picture day is tomorrow we worked on her hair tonight so it's ready for tomorrow. And here it is:

My beautiful Princess! I just love her so much!

Some Cute Videos

2010-09-23T22:06:00.001-05:00

Kai "shares" her binky

Kai feeds her baby and herself

Picture Time!

2010-09-18T21:16:00.001-05:00

It's not pretty, but it is reality!

It's sad, but we haven't had a family picture taken since I was pregnant with Kai. We're such slackers! So today we had our first photo shoot with all 6 kiddos. It really went well given that Kai and Eddie are so young. Trying to keep 6 kids' attention focused on the photographer was a bit of a challenge as was getting everyone to smile at the same time, but we did manage to get some really good shots. The studio we went to was Portrait Innovations and I have to say that I'm REALLY impresed with them. I think we'll be going back again for more pics whenever needed.

Cheeleader for a Night

2010-09-18T00:06:00.005-05:00

The cute cheerleader

The cute hair do

Emmy got to be a cheerleader at the TWHS game tonight. We signed her up for a one day cheerleading clinic by the TWHS cheerleaders. As part of that, all the kids who signed up (K-5 grade) got to cheer for the first half of the game. She was so cute and even got a little silly as the night went on. We were really surprised by this since she is usually so reserved. Sterling, Joe and Cori all had fun watching the game and the band as well as Emmy cheering. Kai just liked the freedom to climb up and down on the bleachers. Eddie....well, he slept through most of it. We just happened to sit across the aisle from one of Sterling's friends from school and a couple rows in front of 2 kids in Cori's preschool class so there was plenty to entertain the boys! It was a fun family night out!

Unfortunately we forgot the video camera so I had to use my phone for a video. You can't see her very well but this is a video of the kiddos cheerleading. She is in the 2nd row with the black skirt and white zebra mask on her head. Kind of in the middle of the screen (not the one with the pom-poms).

(Yeah, good luck finding her, I know)

Eddie Can Laugh!

2010-09-12T21:41:00.001-05:00

Cousin Fun and other Pics

2010-09-09T17:11:00.001-05:00

That's a stick Ethros. Thanks for the nature lesson Cori!

Look at our sweet, happy Rori! She's saying happy birthday to her cousin Joe!

How many cousins does it take to ride a snow ski?

The next two pictures go together:

Notice Kai- She is unhappy that Ethan has taken her spot on the snow ski.

K: No Efan!! It's MY TURN!!

K:That's it! I will rip your head off if you don't remove yourself from MY toy!!

Ethan and Kai having a tea party on the deflated bouncer

Kai helping to "roll" out the air.

What a cute group of cousins!

Ike just loves his Grandma Kathi!

Ike taking Kai out to an expensive restaurant.

Reviews: The food tasted like plastic.

Cori is so good as to take his sister out for a ride in his black Cadillac Escalade.

What a HOT guy! ;-)

Emmy and her bus stop buddy. They always link arms and hold hands to ensure they sit by eachother. So stinkin' cute!

A view of Sterling you've never seen. Yes, this is really his skull from an xray at the orthodontist visit. Notice the lack of a brain....Emmy had the same problem.

Kai loving Hershey. She just loves animals just like her Aunt Megan!

The Bidwell Crew

To the First Man I Ever Loved...

Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year!

Once Upon a Time...

My First Born

Our Goofy Eddie

Happy Birthday to My First Princess

Don't Step On A Crack...

Time Travel

Happy Birthday Cori-O!

A Life Worth Remembering

Then Again, Maybe It's Not!

Movie Night, Anyone?

Emmy Cheerleads and GI Joe's Birthday Party

A Skew What?

Back 2 School... A While Ago

One Year Older and Wiser Too!

A Picture Post

Meet Me in St. Louis

Summer Fun

Conversations to Remember

Happy 5th Birthday Robert Allen!

InstaFriday!!

A cupcake's worth...$1?

Boo Bear's 1 Year Check Up

Family Fun Night

Eddie's 1st Birthday Party

I'm Not Ready for This Day

The BBQ

Adventures in Orthodontics

Perspective

Our Little Adventure Part 4: Utah, Wednesday thru Friday

Guess Who! **UPDATE**

Our Little Adventure Part 3: Utah, Monday and Tuesday

Only in Movies...Right??

Our Little Adventure Part 2: Utah, Saturday and Sunday

Our Little Adventure Part 1: Montana!!

Easter Fun

Science Fair Project

The Trip I Did Not Take

Conversations to Remember

Update in Pictures

Just a Picture Post

A Poem from Emmy

Kinda Creepy Pics

My Rainbow Baby Is 2!

Daddy's Girl

He's crawling!!

Conversations to Remember

Let it snow!

It took 2 days...

It's been over 10 years...

Kai and Eddie

What a handsome boy!

Catching Up

A Decade...

It's Great to be 8!

Seriously?!

hOPpy KAilYn

PTC's for SEJC

Picture Day Hair Do Sneak Peak

Some Cute Videos

Picture Time!

Cheeleader for a Night

Eddie Can Laugh!

Cousin Fun and other Pics

Guess Who! UPDATE